51AV视频

From the desk of Jordy Barksdale, Director of Campus Life & Ministry:

The spring semester tends to be an emotional roller coaster for the graduating seniors. They鈥檝e got to finalize what college they want to attend, plan where they will live and who they鈥檒l live with, get the mounds of paperwork completed and start the goodbye process with friends they known since Lower School. While this process may seem steep for the students, oftentimes it鈥檚 even harder for the parents to process. If you are a parent of a graduating senior, here are 9 things you should remember about your relationship with your child during this exciting and strange season.

1. Communication Is Hard

   • As if you didn鈥檛 know this already. What used to be the normal, 鈥渉ey, how are you doing?鈥� conversations have turned to 鈥淚 know I need to register for Orientation! You鈥檝e told me 5 times today!鈥� Unfortunately your communication may face some road blocks in the next few months. Persevere! Both of you have a lot on your minds.

1. They May Not Want To Hang Out

   • Baby bird is spreading those wings and about to fly out from the nest. Their gaze is focused on what is outside the nest, even though you want them to enjoy every last moment nestled tightly with you in the thicket. You can鈥檛 understand why they don鈥檛 want to sit with you and talk about their feelings and enjoy their final days in your home. Consider planning one night of the week until 鈥淭he Great Departure鈥� to enjoy a family dinner and quality time together.

1. Not The School You Envisioned? It鈥檚 Really Okay

   • You painted their room maroon, took them to Midnight Yell, named your dog Reveille and all of the sudden they are going to鈥︹��I am about to say it鈥�..ANOTHER SCHOOL. Come to find out other schools do exist! Other, really great, highly respected institutions that will allow your child to receive a cherished degree and get a great job one day. Give them some grace and rejoice with them that they are going to college!

1. Graduation Doesn鈥檛 Mean They Are Gone Forever

   • Sometimes it seems we鈥檝e gotten those two things confused. During this season of life, our emotions tell us they are interchangeable. Your child is transitioning into a new, very different environment where they will quickly learn the art of adulthood. It鈥檚 good to cry, but don鈥檛 forget that graduation doesn鈥檛 mean you have to say goodbye forever. You are forever their parent and they are forever your child, graduation doesn鈥檛 change that.

1. They Aren鈥檛 As Excited About Pictures As You Are

   • Their last dance, last musical performance, last district game, last Calculus test, and the dreaded, last day of school are all about to happen. For some of the big 鈥渓ast events鈥� you should absolutely document the moment by taking a picture. Just be patient with them because it means a lot more to you than it does to them. They鈥檒l appreciate it one day for sure, but that day hasn鈥檛 arrived just yet.

1. Your Other Kids Still Matter

   • Baby bird may be taking flight soon, but don鈥檛 forget about Baby bird鈥檚 little sibling and the one that鈥檚 already miles from the next. They still need your love and attention. This can be a difficult time for them as they can perceive you neglecting them a bit. Continue to fight for time with them as well. Speak value to them during this graduation season.

1. Have The Difficult Talk

   • It鈥檚 not too late I promise. Your child is about to embark on an adventure that has all the temptations you would ever not want them to be a part of. Be honest with them about what the consequences are personally, academically and maybe legally. Your vulnerability has significant benefit in their life. Let them know you have been through the same struggles and desire for them to make decisions that glorify the Lord.

1. Communicate Your Availability

   • I know you want your child to call you on a random Tuesday night because they miss you. They may absolutely do that! Make sure they know that you are 100%, without fail, available to them for whatever they may need. It doesn鈥檛 matter if it鈥檚 a breakup, a stressful all-nighter in the library, difficult roommate situation or something more serious, make sure you communicate to them how willing you are to continue to be a support system to them. They need to, without a shadow of a doubt, feel confident that you are truly one phone call away to provide a patient sounding board for them in college.

1. Squeeze Them Tight and Tell Them You Love Them

   • Amidst the communication struggle and stressful deadlines, take a moment, give them a big hug and tell them you love them. There are fewer things as healing as being affirmed by someone who genuinely cares for you. Believe it or not, you aren鈥檛 parent of the year this year and that鈥檚 okay. You鈥檝e made mistakes and haven鈥檛 parented perfectly. Pat yourself on the back because you鈥檝e raised your little one from wearing a diaper to holding a diploma and that鈥檚 a miracle (can I get an amen?)

Cheers to you Mom and Dad! You did it! Enjoy the season for everything it鈥檚 worth because, after all, it鈥檚 the last time they鈥檒l ever graduate from high school.